How to change my daughter's mind

[BrennaKessler]

I don't know if I am in the right category but I really need help. I am worried about my 14 year daughter. She has become a computer widow. She prefers to spend most of her time on computer. I want to change her mind now. She has no interest in any religion. I am surprised how she got all that stupid stuff in her mind (most probably this is the internet). I could not convince her to join the Sunday service even after so many discussions. I am a working mom and I am really worried about my only child who makes my family.

[lajackson]

I don't know if I am in the right category but I really need help. I am worried about my 14 year daughter. She has become a computer widow. She prefers to spend most of her time on computer. I want to change her mind now. She has no interest in any religion. I am surprised how she got all that stupid stuff in her mind (most probably this is the internet). I could not convince her to join the Sunday service even after so many discussions. I am a working mom and I am really worried about my only child who makes my family.

This Forum is intended to discuss technical matters, so I will propose a technical solution in a moment.

As for agency, you really cannot take it away, so my only suggestion there, having been a parent, is that most folks, including children, do what they want to do based on the benefits they think they will receive from doing it. So the parenting challenge we always faced was helping our children to believe that it was more beneficial to do the right thing or the better thing each time they reached a decision point.

So for the technical solution, there are ways to make computer access unavailable at certain times. In our home, those times were when homework should be done, during family home evening, during church time on Sunday (and most of Sunday, generally), and on other important family occasions.

Just because the computer is not available at church time doesn't make a child want to go to church, but he or she may find church more interesting than just sitting around home without computer access during that same time.

And there is always the McConkie solution I once read about. "Yes, son, you have your agency. You may choose to go to church happy, or you may choose to go to church unhappy. Go get ready." I will be the first to admit that this works better with a younger child than with a teenager.

Finally, I would suggest you have a visit with your home teachers, visiting teachers, and/or your bishop or other priesthood leaders. They are the ones who are best able to help with the non-technical solutions that this Forum is not really able to handle.

[KeithWilson]

I would also recommend a web filter product called k9, http://www1.k9webprotection.com/ It's free, and it will help you see where she is going, and you can then address restrictions. Maybe the home teacher might discuss it as well. Hang in there.

[marianomarini]

14 years old! Too young for self-guiding and too old for parent-guiding! Change her mind? No ways!
Maybe you can sit down with her for a cupple of ours and let her share what she find so funny!
Let her guiding you up and down to the wales. This will keep you both more close to be able to speak with an open heart.
Not because you KNOW and she NOT but as companions in the life trip!
This will change her mind? I don't know, but it's the best try.

[marianomarini]

Let her guiding you up and down to the wales.

The internet wales? Obviously I mean WAVES!